I’m in it. The dark place. The place where my brain doesn’t feel like it’s my own. Where the creepy, crawly thoughts start burrowing into my brain. I can’t get them out. It’s like needing pest control for my mental state.
I’m frustrated because things had been going relatively well with everything.
Maybe it’s stress. I have taken on a LOT these past couple of months. Between work, my two babies, the new puppy,my husband and my Climb Out of the Darkness fundraising efforts (see below) – my plate has been mighty full. I have forgotten about myself. Forgotten that self care is so necessary for me. Forgotten to take a deep breath. Forgotten that just because things aren’t perfect doesn’t mean I’m not doing the best that I possibly can.
I hope this darkness doesn’t last too long. The good news is I recognized it this time immediately. And, if all else fails, on June 21st I will use my walk to literally Climb Out of my Darkness. There is light….I just have to get to it.
Most of you know that I am participating in the Climb Out of the Darkness 2014 to benefit postpartumprogress.org. I am leading a climb at the Ijams Nature Center here in Knoxville, TN. Any donation to this amazing cause would help! Also, if you would like to walk, please register at http://www.crowdrise.com/rebeccasmith10-cotd2014
Postpartum Progress (http://postpartumprogress.org) is a non-profit organization and online community of support resources for women experiencing postpartum depression and all other mental illnesses related to pregnancy and childbirth. Today, half a million women annually are accessing up-to-date information in plain language about perinatal mood and anxiety disorders on the Postpartum Progress blog (http://postpartumprogress.com) and, more importantly, are able to hear from other moms who have recovered. The funds raised from this event will allow Postpartum Progress to create new educational materials to be used by obstetricians, pediatricians and others, as well as new materials to help educate the media on the public health impact of postpartum depression and related illnesses on mothers and children.